New Attitude

I love Patti LaBelle and especially her song New Attitude.  After the tumultuous night I had last night and then finally falling asleep I woke up with her song on my mind. (Words below)

Although I am still being emotionally tossed around I have more of a handle on this situation. I am connected  to and aware of all the regression around the experiences that I am now having. At least as my mentor and friend, John Lee, wrote in one of his books “I am in a Conscious Regression as opposed to a Trance Regression”.

Now what does that mean to me?  In my interpretation of that statement – It means that I can contact that young part of myself and become the perfect parent to her and all her needs. Unlike what I actually had at that young age when the trauma actually took place.

Many things are unraveling and unfolding in and throughout my life right now.  As I started spiraling I fell back into the lap of that 13 year old girl (inside of me) who was so lost, scared and mostly alone in her thoughts and feelings. She/I was petrified of what was going to happen next. So as things unfold in my present day  life- my work is to consciously connect with that part of myself.

How do I do that?  By asking myself as I start to worry or start a critical voice….”How old do I feel right now?”  “Is there a particular circumstance or situation that is coming to mind that I can contact and revisit?” Revisit it NOT to hold it in place but to have it as a place holder to help me move gently from that which is paralyzing me to a more present moment of empowerment, safety and calm awareness. By being the “perfect parent” to that scared child within I then grow myself up while also holding the “child awareness” inside of me. I can then start to integrate her and feel less fragmented in the experience.  I never want to lose the wonder, joy, curiosity, excitement, fun and giggling of that 13 year who still lives inside of me. By consciously connecting these parts she gets to be her while I take over as the conscious adult watching, protecting and mostly loving all my parts.

This is a technique that I created many years ago called Inner Self Talk. I figured as long as I was having these intense conversations within myself anyway-Why not make them productive and loving. This has taken years to discover and articulate.  However, if we are intent on knowing ourselves and wanting to live in consciousness and connected with our deeper selves then this might be something that interests you.

There are many books that can be read on the subject of re-parenting ourselves.

But in the meantime, I will sing along with Patti while I dance, laugh and be in the wonder of our human condition with all of its ups, downs and everything in between.

“New Attitude”

Running hot,

Running cold,

I was running into overload,

That was extreme.

I took it so high, so low, so long,

There was no where to go like a bad dream.

Somehow that wires uncrossed,

The table were turned,

Never knew I had such a lesson to learn.

I’m feeling good from my hat to my shoe,

Know where I am going and I know what to do,

I’ve tidied up my point of view,

I’ve got a new attitude.

I’m in control,

My worries are few,

‘Cause I got love like I never knew,

Ooo, ooo, ooo, ooo…

I’ve got a new attitude,

I am wearing a new dress, a new hat,

Brand ideas,

As a matter of fact,

I’ve changed for good.

Must have been the cold nights, new moon,

Night changes,

Or forget your love for just being like I should.